WTF? Tattoo Fails

I always wanted a tattoo in college but never got one, mainly because I was broke but also because I had this thing about voluntary pain; I pledged to myself I would avoid it at all costs. A lot of my friends, and my college boyfriend (s) had tattoo’s. The tribal band was very vogue when I went to school, there was no shortage of black ink┬ádisasters on pasty non-muscular white biceps, yuck.

The girls had butterflies, dolphins, and other adorable little animals doodled onto their bodies. Many times it was on the hip, or the lower part of their calf. Not too many did the tramp stamp – that time had not yet come. I was always kinda jealous though, I wanted a tat to show my independence, my bravery, my spontaneity. I wanted one on my taught little 110 lb bod that would clearly communicate my coolness. Well things have changed apparently, because in the last week I have stumbled across a few tattoo’s online that have left me thinking -What The Fuck. Did you see I actually spelt that out? No little WTF, no shortening it because this shit is un-fucking-real.

1. The face tat – This is never a good idea. It is hard to get a job when you have words, pictures, or symbols permanently imprinted on your face. It tends to be distracting to your qualifications and intelligence. This one seemed redundant though, cause clearly by the look of this chick’s expression she already is a little nuts.

I think She's Psycho!

I think She’s Psycho!

2. Cartoon Tattoos – ┬áThis is questionable at best. Cartoon tat’s look ok when you get them at 18, but as you age your tat just ages you. It is hard to look at a 40 something year old that has a cartoon of the Tasmanian Devil on his arm and not think – wow that was not a good choice. However, this one here is a whole new level of wow. And even though it can be hidden under a shirt, it should never ever have happened in the first place. I give you Disney tattoo’s on men = NO! Disney on a man’s ass = Absolutely NOT! Disney 7 Dwarfs, with one missing and cave surrounding your crack = WTF Are you thinking? And clearly you have no friends.

 

Disney Tattoo's Gone Bad

Disney Tattoo’s Gone Bad

3. Tattoo’s that scream I am a Whore/Slut/Stripper etc. – I think I have found the one that may be the pinnacle of all ass tat’s. The one that truly makes you stop and think WHAT.THE.FUCK was this girl thinking?! When she is 50 how is that going to look? Not good because it already looks horrible! Or how about if/when she gets pregnant – when she is spread eagle with her hoo-ha out for all to see part of this lovely note will be readable by the entire staff. That is going to come up around the water cooler later, I guarantee it. I would be a little embarr’ass’ed. So without further adieu I give you the worst fucking tattoo ever, though she did rhyme it so that’s something, right?

Open for Business was already taken

Open for Business was already taken

Have you seen, or do you have any tattoo fails? If they are this bad please no photos!

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Comments

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Comments

  1. Kari says:

    If I were a tattoo artist, I would have to draw the line somewhere and refuse to do any tattoos that I would be embarrassed to show my grandmother.

    • theshitastrophy.com says:

      Seriously – if they had an oath, maybe like a dr or something the world would be a better place!

  2. OH MY GAWD!!!!!!! Butt Slut takes the friggin’ cake for WORST.IDEA.EVER!!!
    All I can think of is when she’s 50 and going in for the yearly Rectal Recon, AKA Lower Endoscopy, and the Doc gets a good look at her tat and calls for a bigger camera…(Sorry. HAD to go there!)

    • theshitastrophy.com says:

      I am not so sure this lady in particular will be doing preventative endoscopy maintenance, but if she does she will be sure to be water cooler fodder!

  3. Red says:

    I went to high school with Levi LaVallee (X games gold medalist) one day he walked into class and strutting around proceeded to bust out an arm tat that read LUNCHIN LEVI. …major misspell as it was supposed to say LAUNCHIN LEVI (nickname earned for ddoing crazy jumps) luckily he eventually found someone to fix it and you can’t tell….but for awhile there it was pretty ridiculous!

    • theshitastrophy.com says:

      OMG! That’s horrible – poor guy cause that could be taken many different ways, and none of them good. That would be Tat rule #4 = make sure your words are spelled correctly!!!

  4. Accidentally ended up at the mall on Tax Free Weekend… Boy does tax free shit bring out the crazies. No psycho bitches, but plenty of awe inspiring face tats. Makes me feel pretty damn good about myself.

    • theshitastrophy.com says:

      I can only imagine. It’s like the Friday night crowd on steroids. Why do people do tattoos on their face? Just no, never, no, please, bad idea!